Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
Randomize
