I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
