You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
cat food counts as protein by the way
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize