out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
