I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
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