they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Randomize
