Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
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