Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
Randomize
