bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
Randomize
