remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Randomize
