You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
Randomize
