I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
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