you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
Randomize
