I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
Dude! wtf happend last nite? I woke up with 2 black eyes and a head ache
You stepped off the curb and face planted the road...twice
Why didnt you hold me up....and why a second time?
I helped you up but figured it was wayy funnier to watch you fall again then lose my buzz....
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize
