So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
she pinky promised me she was 18
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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