elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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