it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
Randomize
