he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
Randomize
