I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
He kissed a someone with a penis
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
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