His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
Cracked my iPhone screen. Real bad. Girl from last night isn't ugly yet. Stop me if you still think she belongs under a bridge. You have 12 seconds.
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
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