I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
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