So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
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