This is not my ceiling
On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
Randomize
