I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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