She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Randomize
