But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
Randomize
