What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
Randomize
