If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
Randomize