My friends, they love my intelligence
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
God, you're like boner-b-gone
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Randomize
