they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
You were face down in the punch bowl, humming the theme to jaws
That explains the stains on my shirt
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
Randomize
