I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
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