Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
I yelled at your uterus for you.
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
Randomize