I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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