Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
Randomize