Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
Naked. naked and bneed help.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Randomize
