we're chasing vodka with high fives
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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