Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Randomize
