I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
