the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
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