I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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