idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
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