Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
Randomize
