Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
this is an emotional support booty call
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
