that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
