real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
Randomize
