I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
We were destined to go to rehab together
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
Randomize