well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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