Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize
