Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
Randomize
