oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
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