the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
Randomize
